Some of you may want to throw me off of the platform based on the title of this post alone, but wait, let me explain. Yes, it’s true that celebrities have lots of money, adoring fans, good looks and lives of luxury. But they also have to deal with millions of prying eyes attached to people who are trying to find something, anything, that makes them feel connected to their idol. Magazines are clamoring to get pictures of the latest baby bump or the hottest new couple who they re-name, i.e. Brangelina, SoJo, Bennifer.
While I was thinking about the woes of the famous I got distracted and began daydreaming that I was being interviewed for one of my upcoming books that will inevitably become a movie and therefore make me a bona fide celebrity. In my daydream the interviewer asked; “What do you think about the paps?” and I said “Well…I put my feet in the stirrups, with my socks on because those things are cold!” I was embarrassed when I realized the pretend interviewer was talking about the paparazzi.
Back to reality, I contemplated what it would be like to be an artist whose only dream was to practice their craft and live a relatively normal life outside of work. In this age of constant updates and news feeds it is difficult to be under the radar, but not impossible. Some celebrities know how to keep a low profile; their home bases are in areas of the country where seeing them at the grocery store would be a non-factor, they blend in with the other city folk, stay out of trouble, etc.
For those celebrities who always find themselves in the loids (short for tabloids, go ahead, use it) because they called someone and told them they would be at a particular place – cry me a river. For those, like Halle Berry, Kristen Bell and other stars who have fought to keep their children safe from the looniest photogs, they should be able to be off of work and not worry about being harassed.
Think about it, celebrities can’t go to the airport without swarms of shutter flies trying to take their pictures and screaming insane questions at them like; “What do you think about being so fat?” I can tell you this, when I am making millions of dollars per minute that will not give anyone the right to sit outside of my home and pounce on me in the wee hours of the morning, ala Kanye West.
And don’t get me started on Twitter and Facebook and all the other places where celebrities can be found hanging out. Twitter, in particular can be brutal for celebrities. Let’s take for example, the super fans of stars like Lady Gaga, Rihanna and Beyoncé who, if you say anything their fans deem disrespectful to their pack leader they will attempt to desecrate you, I call them Twitter Gangs.
We also have these blogger and paparazzi based shows and websites that are so crass and disrespectful that it makes me ashamed that I read them. It’s usually something copied and pasted from another more reputable (relatively speaking) site but they title it something like; “Little Red Riding Hood is carrying a Gut Full of King Kong” (translation: she got knocked up). Or they use salacious titles like “One of the Jackson’s in Rehab?” and inside the piece you see a picture of them walking past the Betty Ford Clinic on their way to a movie premiere. The truth is that their tricky ways get me to click on the link, so who’s the dummy?
We tend to think that because celebrities have money and all of the fancy stuff that comes along with it that they ask for it; the prying eyes, the judgment and the outright disrespect. They knew what they were getting into, right? Wrong, I’m sure a lot of them didn’t expect part of the world to be online-assholes who claim they don’t like bullies but do it to celebrities all of the time just because they can.
When I finally make it big I will be grateful and appreciative of all of my fans – but I’m not sure I will be able to kick-it with them on Twitter and Instagram too much. People can be mean and rude and I don’t like that. I don’t like it in my personal life and I certainly don’t have to take that in my celebrity work life!
We would all do well if we just remember that celebrities are people too.
Thank you and be well.
m. e. nash, Future Celebrity & Philanthropist